For the estranged, hardly talking family

Low expectations

Looooooooow. Let other families go to the moon. You just walk down the sidewalk a few feet. Go to the moon later.

Baby steps. Little things. Brief, but regular.

Generosity. Give.

Honesty. Encouragement. Positive.

Call. Or text. Short. “I was just thinking of you . . . thought I’d say hi.” Keep it light with emoticons. Then again in a few days or weeks. Over time, make short, positive touches a normal thing. Start there.

Stay away from the past, controversy, drama.

Grace wins.

Patience wins.

Find one thing

Find one true, positive, unique, good thing about a member of your family that you want to touch.

Then tell them that one thing. Again, call or text or email. In-person’s even better. Short. No big discussion. Short leaves less time for misinterpretation and for things to go wrong.

“You know, you really . . . look great . . . do that well . . . take care of things around here . . . make an awesome meat loaf . . .”

Or “I love the way you . . .” But again, it’s gotta be true.

Find one thing, then later another, then another.

You can’t start a fire without a spark. Then some kindling. Big logs later.

If you had to find one true, good thing right now, what would it be and who would it be to?

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A Family Like Yours is 31 Days of encouragement to help you appreciate, influence, and love the family you have (no matter what).

This is day 8.

You can subscribe below or at the top on the right.

About the Author


Gary Morland helps you feel better about your most challenging family relationships, and helps you actually improve those relationships - all by adopting simple attitudes, perspectives, expectations, and actions (the same ones that changed him and his family).


  1. Christy Fitzwater

    This series is INCREDIBLY rich. I can’t share it or quote you fast enough. Thank you so much.

  2. m

    Again, my hubby said, “ME!” Ditto, I say… We are so enjoying this series. Matter of fact, y’all would make fast friends…blessings on your day:)
    Blessings & <3 M

  3. Kelly

    Not sure why but I’m finding today’s assignment uncomfortable. I guess I need to jump in with no expectations. Just grace.


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